Tag Archives: Communication

Meditation – our experience of self and of the world…

garden2

“Positive emotions, such as compassion and patience, are teachable skills; and the way we think directly influences our experience of the world.”

Excerpts –

Montaigne believed that meditation is the finest exercise of one’s mind and David Lynch uses it as an anchor of his creative integrity. Over the centuries, the ancient Eastern practice has had a variety of exports and permutations in the West, but at no point has it been more vital to our sanity and psychoemotional survival than amidst our current epidemic of hurrying and cult of productivity. It is remarkable how much we, as a culture, invest in the fitness of the body and how little, by and large, in the fitness of the spirit and the psyche — which is essentially what meditation provides.

We know that the self is a social construct and the dissolution of its illusion, Harris argues, is the most valuable gift of meditation:

The conventional sense of self is an illusion [and] spirituality largely consists in realizing this, moment to moment. There are logical and scientific reasons to accept this claim, but recognizing it to be true is not a matter of understanding these reasons. Like many illusions, the sense of self disappears when closely examined, and this is done through the practice of meditation.

See the posting:  http://www.brainpickings.org/2014/09/29/sam-harris-waking-up-meditation/

Leave a comment

Filed under listening, mental health, philosophy, psychiatry, psychoanalytic psychotherapy/counseling, psychology

‘Try to be a little kinder’…

Image

It’s a bit embarrassing to have been concerned with the human problem all one’s life and to find at the end that one has no more to offer by way of advice than ‘Try to be a little kinder.’

Aldous Huxley, quoted in The Open Road: The Global Journey of the Fourteenth Dalai Lama by Pico Iyer

1 Comment

Filed under Uncategorized

On mindful listening…

conversation2

I open with this short excerpt on mindful listening – for listening, being one of the key elements in maintaining a good relationship with another person, is also one of the fundamental ingredients in any therapeutic endeavor.  Freud considered the idea of ‘evenly suspended attention’, and while referring to this concept may be stretching the point a bit, it speaks to the intentional act of fully and determinedly listening to another.  Too often, I sit with two people that are unable to listen to one another, wishing rather “to get their point across” in the conversation. The consequence is that one person frequently comes to a point where their confidence is shaken, where they may feel defeated and unable to imagine a better place with the other. Rudy Oldeschulte

(This excerpt is from the April 2014 issue of Mindful magazine. Author Mirabai Bush)

            Thoreau said, “The greatest compliment that was ever paid me was when one asked me what I thought and attended to my answer.”  Mindful listening helps us be fully present for another person. It is the gift of our attention. It moves us closer to each other. It allows the speaker to feel less vulnerable and more inclined to open up to the listener. Not listening creates separation and fragmentation, which is always painful. 

            To listen mindfully to another person, stop doing anything else, breathe naturally, and simply listen, without an agenda, to what is being said. If thoughts about other things arise, gently let them go and return to the speaker’s words. As responses arise in your mind, wait until you’ve heard all that has to be said before replying. Try not to let your story overcome the speaker’s.  Be curious; don’t assume that you know. Listen for feelings as well as the words. 

            And you will want to be listened to also. But when you’re speaking, if the person you’re talking to doesn’t appear to be mindfully listening, be patient. As Winnie the Pooh once said, “It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear.” 

1 Comment

Filed under conversation, listening, mental health, notes, philosophy, psychiatry, psychoanalytic psychotherapy/counseling, psychology

Belonging…

Alexander Artway - Parisian Café

“I’ve always tried to make a home for myself, but I have not felt at home in myself. I’ve worked hard at being the hero of my own life. But every time I checked the register of displaced persons, I was still on it. I didn’t know how to belong. Longing? Yes. Belonging? No.”

Jeanette Winterson Why Be Happy When You Could Be Normal?

Photo- A Artway

Leave a comment

Filed under mental health, notes, psychiatry, psychoanalytic psychotherapy/counseling, psychology, Uncategorized

On Loss and Mourning….

Kew gardens

Excellent read…well worth the time to absorb…

EXCERPT:  In The Long Goodbye(public library), her magnificent memoir of grieving her mother’s death, Meghan O’Rourke crafts a masterwork of remembrance and reflection woven of extraordinary emotional intelligence. A poet, essayist, literary critic, and one of the youngest editors the New Yorker has ever had, she tells a story that is deeply personal in its details yet richly resonant in its larger humanity, making tangible the messy and often ineffable complexities that anyone who has ever lost a loved one knows all too intimately, all too anguishingly. What makes her writing — her mind, really — particularly enchanting is that she brings to this paralyzingly difficult subject a poet’s emotional precision, an essayist’s intellectual expansiveness, and a voracious reader’s gift for apt, exquisitely placed allusions to such luminaries of language and life as Whitman, Longfellow, Tennyson, Swift, and Dickinson (“the supreme poet of grief”).

LINK:

http://www.brainpickings.org/index.php/2014/06/09/meghan-o-rourke-the-long-goodbye/

Leave a comment

Filed under mental health, notes, psychiatry, psychoanalytic articles, psychology, Uncategorized

Thought and communication…

coffee mug

“There is something at the bottom of every new human thought, every thought of genius, or even every earnest thought that springs up in any brain, which can never be communicated to others, even if one were to write volumes about it and were explaining one’s idea for thirty-five years; there’s something left which cannot be induced to emerge from your brain, and remains with you forever; and with it you will die, without communicating to anyone perhaps the most important of your ideas.”

—        Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Idiot

Leave a comment

Filed under psychoanalytic psychotherapy/counseling, psychology

Susan Cain…on Introverts…

susan cain

http://www.ted.com/talks/susan_cain_the_power_of_introverts#t-6373

 

Leave a comment

Filed under mental health, psychiatry, psychoanalytic psychotherapy/counseling, psychology, Uncategorized